Missing Puzzle Pieces: Intro

The banging on his door and persistent buzzing were sounds he was trained to respond to, even from amidst the deepest of dreams. He was halfway out of bed before he even realized he was awake. Jamming the door release, the door slid open, tumbling the rouser forward into his arms. Still half awake, his brain didn't know what to make of the opposing signals it was receiving--the alarm was familiar, but it was Karina who had fallen into the room.

"Sam, please, let me in," she urged, pressing him backwards into his quarters and hurriedly slapping at the door release button, the frightened body language not abating until the door was shut, and even then, only slightly.

By this point he was aware that there was no alarm sounding, he was not being roused from sleep for a sudden duty, but by his close friend. "Kari! Kari... what's going on?" He had to grab her shoulders to make her look at him instead of furtively around the room; there was fear written in her face he'd never seen before.

"I can't explain, Sam, just... please, where's your sidearm?"

She was jumpy and it scared him enough to go right to the shelf by his bed, taking it down to hold out, halfway stretched to her. "What's going on?" he repeated. Her hand swiftly fell to the wrapped gun between them, and she pulled it from its holster with a practiced flick that bothered him--she wasn't licensed to carry a gun--and when she flicked off the safety, he yelped. "Kari!"

Her face was a myriad of different emotions, fear prevalent, but there was a tinge of compassion as her eyes met his. "You wouldn't understand even if I could..." she shook her head. "Sam, I know what's going to happen, and this is the only way. The only thing I can say is I'm sorry."

Things moved in slow motion for him as she raised the pistol, his shock as she aimed it towards herself brushed aside as he jumped at her, every minute detail breaking into his consciousness as too many things happened at once. She pulled the trigger. He slapped the gun towards the floor.

A splash of blood told him he'd missed, and they hit the floor together as the alarm sirens went off.
~

Sam Katarn flew out of bed, sweat dripping down his body as he shook, rushing to the window to open it and let in some fresh air. He gasped in huge lungfuls, chest heaving as he tried to clear his head of the nightmare. Three months after the event, the emotional impact of reliving the scenario still took its nightly toll on him.

Chilled to the bone, he shut the window, closing away the noise of the planet--it never abated, not even at night. He needed space, the silence of being out beyond anything...

But they'd been right. He couldn't stay after that.

~
"It is the ruling of this Royal Court, held in session this seventh day of Tyro, that Lieutenant Samuel Aleksander Katarn is wholly innocent of all charges brought against him." He could remember the sigh of relief from his representative, though he himself had felt next to nothing.

"Furthermore, it is the will of this Court that Lieutenant Katarn be released from active duty for a period of three months, his return to active status pending psychological approval." The clang of the tiny gong, and then the courtroom had bubbled with talk from all parties, given no more of his attention than much of the rest of the court's proceedings had--all but the security feed.

After they played the feed for the Court, it was no surprise that he was released. It was all the proof his representative needed to clear his name of the charges. But it had shaken him more than he had planned--he could barely speak afterwards.

No amount of preparation could have saved him the heartache as he watched--he couldn't tear his eyes away from the sight. The projectile from his gun tore away part of her flesh, leaving the gaping hole in her neck that had so drained her of life, no matter how hard the medics onboard ship had worked.
~

He forced himself away from the memory, but it kept coming back. He couldn't escape it. Sam knew, now, why it was that the dream had so shaken him--at least this time--it was the day of his examination. He had been ordered to present himself to a psychologist after the noon hour, and every bit of this would be raked over. Of course it stung anew.